Dec 21, 2012
California blondes have grown impatient watching interchangeable bleach-blonde Malibu Barbie wannabes flapping their Botoxed, overly-glossed lips from NYC.
A little California love, maybe? Fugettaboutit.
You can't even tell all of those FOX News blondes apart, for Pete's sake. Did Rupert Murdoch watch too many "Charlie's Angels" reruns from 1977, or is FOX just overly-inspired by California blondes?
FOX must know that viewers are laughing their heads off, saying:
- "We Jiggle, You Decide"
- "FOX Nudes Channel"
- "The Most Bleached Name In News"
- "Fair & Botoxed"
- "The 'TOX News Channel"
- "This Is A FOX Boobs Alert"
This constitutes an act of East Coast/West Coast WAR!
The Brewing Battle Of The Blondes
The blondes of Californiality can easily slap those 'New York Dolls' clear across the Hudson --- all the way, man.
FOX should not try to justify their 'Invasion of the Blondes' in New York by pointing to decades of Hollywood blondes in the media. Don't go there, babe.
Blondes are, like, the California State Flower, dude!
If FOX keeps regurgitating blurry-lensed, pixelated doll-head images through millions of TV screens from Manhattan, it will force California blondes into action.
The Glamor Girls of the Golden State are battle-ready, with sharpened nails, blinding teeth, stiletto heels, and diamonds that will cut you up! Once our Pacific Platinum Princesses put on their militant uniforms (by Frederick's of Hollywood) it's all OVER, dahling.
Please, FOX News, don't make us play that "California Gurls" song again, which (we know) drives you insane.
FOX News Blondes