Gay Spousal Abuse on the Rise

Gay and lesbian domestic violence is on the rise in relationships, including same-sex marriages. 

While many LGBT marriages are happy ones, others endure violence and brutality that goes unreported.

"Gay" has traditionally been a synonym for "happy," but many gay marriages in California and elsewhere are anything but blissful.

Struggles with an LGBT identity, insecurities in dealing with heterosexual society, and headline-grabbing LGBT developments can contribute to what many gay married partners refer to as a public rollercoaster of emotions and attitudes in 2012.

Others simply point to the old adage that states "you always hurt the ones you love."

Home is the only place most people can let their hair down and express themselves freely, so domestic partners frequently bear the brunt of frustrations that often translate into gay domestic violence...

...or murder.

Here are some facts on domestic gay violence, known as "the second closet" or "the broken rainbow":

• A study in the Journal of Interpersonal Violence examined conflict and violence in lesbian relationships, finding that 90 percent of lesbians surveyed had suffered acts of verbal aggression from their lesbian partners, with 31 percent reporting incidents of physical violence.
• A Lie-Gentlewarrior study of lesbians reported that 51 percent of the respondents indicated that they had been abused by a female partners, while a Coleman study of lesbians reported that 47 percent had experienced repeated acts of violence.  
• In their book, Men Who Beat the Men Who Love Them: Battered Gay Men and Domestic Violence, Island and Letellier declared that "the incidence of domestic violence among gay men is nearly double that in the heterosexual population."
• The Journal of Social Service Research reported that 51 percent of lesbians stated they had been abused by a female lover/partner.
• A study of lesbian couples reported in the Handbook of Family Development and Intervention indicated that "54 percent had experienced 10 or more abusive incidents, 74 percent had experienced six or more incidents, 60 percent reported a pattern to the abuse, and 71 percent said it grew worse over time."
• Most studies of gay male relationships show that between 75 and 83 percent of homosexuals report they have been emotionally abused by their intimate gay partners.
• Most acts of gay male-male violence and lesbian female-female abuse go unreported in a secretive LGBT subculture that has become used to secrecy.

Sometimes, especially for gay couples, the "happily ever after" of marriage can be elusive if not abusive.

If you are suffering gay marital violence or lesbian domestic abuse, please get help.

Screw the embarrassment or humiliation.  Call 9-1-1 if you have to.  End it now.

Watch the following (very controversial) music video of a song written by Carole King and feel empowered to take action.

Stop Gay Spousal Abuse.